Purple Hearts

Last week, I finally accepted the death of one of my friendships — something I had been resisting for a very long time. Fortunately, the person is alive and well, but my bestowed opinion, emotional attachment, and deep care and concern for this person, which had been challenged off and on for that very long time, have reached their final resting place. From the moment I made the conscious decision to lop the head off that proverbial snake, I have felt an incredible lightness of being - more healthy, more peaceful, more hopeful . . . as though I lost about 200 pounds of unnecessary and dead weight.

It took me a long time to endure the relationship ups and downs and reach this personal breaking point — the point where I felt that for my own personal story I needed to metaphorically kill this darling or have it somehow kill me. It strikes me how the agony, deliberation, and emotional stress in ending this relationship is very similar to making the decision to kill a beloved fictional character in our stories. After all, whether in writing or in ‘real’ life, we tend to get attached and grow a vested interest in the people whom we let inhabit our worlds. But despite the attachment and at times iron-clad heart strings, sometimes a character just has to go. Whether for the growth of the main protagonist, a turning point that moves the story forward, or a black moment that could make or break a story’s outcome, we are often faced with a hard yet necessary decision to eliminate a character from the story.

And despite the pain and suffering that characterizes the act of killing your darlings, aren’t our stories stronger for the painful exercise? Speaking personally, both as a writer and a friend, I must say yes. Either way, there is good that can come from the bad . . . making us better storytellers and better individuals for having endured the process.

So my goal this week is to keep putting on the big-girl pants each morning, one leg at a time, move on from my loss, and embrace my new lightness. A new twist in my story awaits!

RIP, my once and past darling! I wish you no ill will, but I am so happy to be moving onward and upward.

-Jessica

On Wednesday, Bria made an excellent point that sometimes you have to write through the pain- whether it’s writer’s block, personal issues or actual emotional pain, because once you get to the other side, it’s amazing. I agree with this one hundred percent. If you love something, inevitably there will be rough times and you need to stick with it to get to the joy again. However, sometimes you also need to know when to say when.

Maybe the when is after 50 rejection letters and you realize that maybe you should stop sending out queries until you analyze the feedback. Or maybe it’s after editing for six months straight and you have to accept that the manuscript is as polished as you can get it right now (and you need to start sending it out). Or maybe it’s when the words just won’t come anymore on your current ms and you know it’s time to try something new. Whatever the occasion, sometimes you have to stop pushing.

As you know from my last few months of blogs, I’m not writing. Stuck isn’t even the word for it anymore. Creatively tapped? Artistically blank? Devoid of all literary skill? Regardless of the fancy description, it’s just not working. So I’m saying ‘uncle’.

I don’t remember where this password originated, but growing up with two physically overpowering brothers, ‘uncle’ was the only pass to escape the pain. When they would twist my body into five different pretzels and yell ‘Say it, say it!’ into my ear, I would struggle as long as I could, but inevitably I’d have to yell ‘Uncle!’ Only then would tthey let me go.

Using ‘uncle’ was not giving up, but it was conceding to the fact that you weren’t in the position to fight anymore. Like being backed into the corner of the boxing ring and you need the bell to sound so you can take a rest, rinse out your mouth and start over again. I need that not only in my writing, but also in the blog.

In talking to Bria this week about it, I used a bad analogy to explain how I’ve been feeling about the blog. It’s like we’re talking about France- Jessica and Bria live in Paris and I’ve recently relocated to Rome. I can reminisce about chocolate crepes, but Jessica can actually smell them and tell you what street corner vendor has the best ones right now. Memories of the Eiffel Tower dance in my head, but Bria can dance under the lights tonight and share about the people enjoying it with her. They are living writing, I’m remembering.

That being said, I know I haven’t been putting 110 percent into my blog entries and I apologize greatly. My fellow heartlettes and our readers deserve that level of participation and commitment. I can’t give it right now and feel I need to take a hiatus to concentrate on figuring out how to adjust to my new living environment. After all, when in Rome…

So I hope to return from my hiatus soon and re-embark on this adventure with everyone. In the meantime, I won’t be gone far and look forward to the posts of my colleagues, maybe even post a comment a time or two. Until then…

Uncle.

-Meg

The first thing I’d like to clear up is the organization. Being organized does not equal being neat.

I have seen many managers who keep a clean desk and are yet the least organized people in the company. Conversely, sometimes the person with the most chaotic office is the most organized.

Here’s the question: Can you find it or do things get lost or slip through the cracks.

The new year comes and people generally want to do one of three things: Lose weight, Get out of debt, or Get Organized.

OK, STOP! Do not rush out to ikea or Staples to purchase every organizing gadget that catches your eye – Filing systems, organizers, sorters, planners. . . .so many fun things. And yet, just because it sells well and looks nice does not mean it’s your friend.

So, how do you get organized?

The first step is to figure out how you work. Let’s take keeping a planner as our example. I have to versions of work habits to rely on depending on what the company I’m consulting with is like.

The first version is your standard Franklin Covey organizing conventions– this is the one most people are familiar with – prioritize your to do list, put it in order, schedule them.

The second version is something called Do It Now. Sounds like it could never work, right? But I’ve worked in environments where I was doing less project work and more coaching/consulting – things turned at the drop of a hat, people waited until issues became emergencies, the company may be international and you know if you don’t talk to that person in Asia now, you aren’t sure when you’ll get another chance.

So, which works best in your environment?

Now, lets talk about spatial organizing? If you hate filing – filing isn’t going to work for you. Some people stack and need little shelves, others file and need an extra cabinet – one of my friends stole a brilliant idea from his auto shop. He clipped all the pertinent info, contacts, timelines, etc for each project with a large binder clip. Then he put stickpins in the wall and hung each project on a stickpin. The next one in line was the next priority. Nothing was lost, nothing fell through the cracks and he kept with my one simple rule:

The Hit By A Bus rule.

I don’t care if my mangers’ offices look like a tornado hit them – if they’re messy and that’s how they get the most done, fine (as long as clients don’t see it.) BUT, if there’s an emergency, the immediate work or contacts must be easily found. I need to know where things stand, what needs to be done, and who to contact.

OK, but what about all this stuff I’ve bought over the years – I don’t want it to go to waste.

A couple years ago I through a party – sorry, I didn’t know you then or I would have invited you. It was a swap party, with a twist.

Everyone had to do a look at their organizing tools, put aside everything that wasn’t working for them, and make a list of what would work for them.

They all joined me for pizza and tool swapping. You had to leave what wasn’t working and you could only take stuff that was on your list – The party was a hit. The success of the new tools was a hit. Everything left over got donated – WHY? Because trying to work with the wrong organizing tools is as useless as trying to fix a car with a plane tool kit – it slows you down and creates more work than it solves.

So, what issues are you struggling with organizing?

Get them out there, out of the way and then Go Write,

-bria

It’s official. I think the words have left me. I’ve been staring at the blank computer screen for five straight minutes trying to think of my opening line for this New Year’s writer’s resolutions blog. Now five minutes is not the black hole of time, but when your mind is empty and you’re a writer, (and you haven’t been writing for months) those precious three hundred seconds can feel like you’re trapped in space without oxygen.

This moment of frozen panic lead me to thinking about the beautiful email Jessica wrote last night in response to my quiet cry in the darkness…a tiny question hidden at the end of an irrelevant email…what if I never write again? Her response was perfect. She never allowed me to accept that I will NEVER write again, but gave me some avenues to pursue in my investigation of ‘why’ I’m not writing. And the one that stuck with me is her comment about having an inner three-year-old that stomps her feet, pouts and gives up. And having a real live three-year-old in my daily experience, I must admit there are some similarities to the standard tantrum and my recent behavior.

When I completed my last manuscript, I was so proud of it. I actually had a high concept plot (or what I think might be one), characters I wanted to have coffee with, some romance, some drama, even a conflict or two. I felt it was the best writing I had ever done. I let other people read it and got some great feedback and suggestions of areas needing work. Then I sent it out. And the rejections poured in and my heart sank. I started revisions and hated them. Every new word or chapter felt wrong so I stopped. And NaNo started and I struggled. Tremendously. So I threw myself on the floor, kicked my feet and screamed.

Okay, not really on that last part, but that is what I wanted to do. I admit I did pout, and I did growl a few suppressed primal screams. And I definitely whined (just read any blog in the last three months- hell reread this blog!). Therefore, summing it all up- I had an adulterized tantrum. And what happens to a whiny, tantrumming child? She goes in time out.

So here I am, still sitting in time out, literally facing the corner of the room (ironically that’s how my computer is set up). And I’m ready to get up. I want to. So I apologize to my creative process for forcing you into NaNo. It wasn’t the right outlet and did more harm than good. And I’m sorry, my sensitive soul, for rushing you into the world when you weren’t strong enough to deal with the rejections. The story needed polish and I shouldn’t have sent it out to agents when it wasn’t ready. And to my inner negativity, I need to put a leash on you and not let you roam free. Turn to the dark side again, I will not.

For 2008, I will follow my personal promise made last week. In my writing, I will remember that life is too short. I will write when I want to and how I want to. If the story is not working for me, I will find a new one. I will not waste my time and talent on something that weighs me down or does not excite me. I will write without thought of what others will think or how they will react. I will write in hopes of one day getting published, but not to get published. I will write for me.

-Meg

It’s a new year and I must admit I’ve never loved New Year’s Resolutions. Instead, this year, I’m taking vows. Not holy ones, but one’s to my writing. I challenge everyone to make some vows to their own passions.

I, Bria Quinlan, do solemnly swear to treat my writing as a career and not just a mistress-hobby. I will behave professionally when representing my writing and myself and I will work at it as though I am already being paid.

I will do something every day to further my writing craft, whether it be writing, editing, polishing, learning, thinking or researching.

I understand that, just like any other career, vacations are necessary, and - just like any other career - should be planned for and scheduled ahead of time.

To further my writing as a career and a passion, I will continue to learn by reading authors I respect, craft books and attending classes and conferences.

While I respect the input of others and understand that most people give their input in an attempt to be helpful, not destructive, I will learn when to bend and when to remain faithful to my own words.

This year I vow I will transfer my knowledge of management and time and space organizational skills into a workshop for artists so that others can learn the skills so readily available in the business world.

And finally, my beloved writing, I promise you I will send you off with a faithfully penned query letter to at least ten agents by our anniversary, April 19th, so that you may grow to your greatest potential.

These things I swear.
2008 - a year of promise. What are yours?
-bria

New Year’s Eve has always been my favorite holiday. I love that moment at midnight when past, present and future collide for one split second. You can feel the hopeful prayers resonate that ‘this is the year!’ For what? It doesn’t matter…what matters is the clean slate to reach for whatever goal or dream you have. To start over fresh and be the person you want to be…

In my last blog, I briefly mentioned my annual December trip through the calendar and how I lament the troubling times and relive the thrilling ones. In addition, I spend some time figuring out what went wrong- what areas of my life are draining me, what can I improve on, why am I not reaching my goals, etc. These days can lead me into a case of the blahs, but they are a necessary part of the process. That way, I can emerge on January 1 with a clear sense of how I want to live my next 365 days.

For example, in 2007, I chose the word ‘simplify’ as my theme. I decluttered my house (most of it- I think clutter reproduces while you’re sleeping) and held a yard sale. I got rid of anything in my life that drained me. Same with people- only surrounded myself with those who encouraged or inspired (yes you, Heartlettes!). In 2006, I decided to ‘follow my dreams.’ I attended my first writer’s conference and shared my writing with others. A successful year.

So it’s day four of 2008 and what is my theme for the year? I have the idea down pat, but it’s the succinct wording that eludes me. What I do have are three inspiring messages that will guide me at every turn:

On my fridge is a magnet that reads:
Risk- more than others think is safe,
Care- more than others think is wise
Dream- more than others think is practical,
Expect- more than others think is possible.
–Cadet Maxim (not sure if that’s the writer or the magnet maker LOL)

On my neck are charms from an Irish proverb:
Dance as if no one is watching,
Sing as if no one is listening,
And Live each day as if it were your last.

In my heart is a song by Martina McBride:
Anyway
You can spend your whole life buildin’
Somethin’ from nothin’
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway
You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway
God is great, but sometimes life ain’t good
When I pray it doesn’t always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway
This world’s gone crazy and it’s hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway
You can love someone with all your heart
For all the right reasons
And in a moment they can choose to walk away
Love ‘em anyway
You can pour your soul out singin’
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they’ll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yeah sing it anyway
I sing
I dream
I love anyway

Those words will remind me to not worry so much about what other people are thinking. To reach for my dreams without regard for the chance of success. To take chances, work harder and never give up, even if I never make it. Because in the end, I’d rather say that I tried, than admit I didn’t.

So perhaps my short phrase for 2008 is: “Life’s too short.”

How will you live your life in 2008?

-Meg

In my non-writing life I do a lot of Management Training (as well as personal and professional growth development and classes) so with the new year upon us, I thought I’d bring a little of that knowledge to this corner of the world.

This is an exercise usually done on the spot - It should take you no more than 12 minutes. To get the most out of it, don’t think too much, just go with what feels right. If you don’t have time to do this now, come back or print it out, but don’t read ahead.

What you need: Pen and Paper - turn the paper horizontal and make 3 columns of 10 rows.

STEP ONE:  In the first column write down the ten most important things in your life right now. Don’t worry about the order, but do try to make them clear. For example:

“Friends” is not a very clear category. What’s a friend versus an acquaintance? Do you mean a close group or a couple of people? Maybe the most important are only your closest two friends even though you love all your friends.

Some other categories I’ve seen: husband, children, faith, learning, exercise, health, writing, work . . . you get the picture -

Your list can have as few as you want, but now more than 10. Play with the list till your comfortable - - - erase / cross-out and rewrite until you’re comfortable with your list.

Once you’ve COMPLETED Step One, move on to Step Two.

STEP TWO:  Now take the list you came up with and put them in order of importance - the top one being most important.

Once you’ve COMPELTED Step Two, move on to Step Three.

STEP THREE: Using the same list, put it in order from what takes up the MOST TIME WEEKLY to the LEAST TIME.

You’ll notice right away that while work may not be near the top of your “Important” list, it may top your “Time” list. This is normal, work is general a set number of hours and that’s part of life, but let’s look at the rest of your list.

What type of trend do you see? If you’re prioritizing your personal life well, the Important list and the Time list will look pretty similar. If they don’t it’s time to ask yourself some tough questions.

What if one of the top things on your Important list is at the bottom of your Time list? This might be where it belongs, but are you sure?

Let’s think about writing as our example - I did this exercise with some writers, not long ago, most of which were moms AND worked outside the home. Right there most of their time belongs to other things. Some of them managed to still have Writing as one of their top 4 on the Time list - I know you won’t be surprised to hear that this group constituted most of the published authors.

As a group, we shared tips and brainstormed other ways to move Writing (and other Important categories) higher on the Time list:

• Writing at games/rehearsals/practices
• Speaking into a digital recorder on your way to pick-up kids
• Keep a notebook in your bag - think your story through while shopping. Write down your notes while standing in line
• Give up Television - Or cut back. When everyone else is involved in your favorite sitcom, that’s 30 minutes of time to write
• Keep a notebook by your bed. One author said the five minutes before she gets up in the morning is often the most productive - her body has quit needing the alarm to wake her now that she’s excited about her morning routine
• Have an accountability partner - how many days in a row can you have an email/phone conversation where you say “I wrote nothing” before you start finding 5 minute chinks of time

One of the first things people ask me when I sit down to teach or discuss time management with them is how I fit in so much more than them. The answer is: “I don’t.” That’s the honest truth. But I have started fitting in more of the right things.

The thing most people don’t understand about Time Management is this, it’s often Priority Management.

To a successful manager, this becomes second nature at work, but she’ll often leave the skill at the office door. If you aren’t clear what your priorities are, then you aren’t sure what to spend time on, then you aren’t sure how to balance that time.

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m sure everyone reading this is saying, “Yeah, but you don’t know what my day is like.”

You’re right. I don’t. But the honest truth is every person can say that. Life is too short to grudge your way through. If you want to enjoy this one chance we have, know what you want out of life and put it on your list.

I do this exercise myself every 6 months - after the first 2 years, I was pleased to see that prioritizing my life had become more of a habit than a chore. I’m doing more of what I love and less of what I tolerate.

Oh, and book one is done.

In two weeks the Heartlettes will be blogging about Time Management. We’d love to hear your own personal tips.

And then, get organized and Go Write!
-bria 

Spent all week trying to figure out a great list of favorites about something fun and exciting. No luck. The only thing that kept coming to mind was how old I felt working so hard to create an enjoyable Christmas for my family. Then I picked up the cardboard light saber creation (fashioned out of an empty wrapping paper roll) and climbed into my x-wing fighter (those shipping boxes are sometimes more fun than the presents themselves) and realized how I still have some youthful spirit to appreciate the magic of the holiday (*note to new readers- I have two young boys).

This contradiction of feeling old and young rattled in my brain long enough this week that I thought I’d use this space to get it all out. So without further ado, these are a few of my favorite (random) things I’ve learned about…turning 35.

• Every woman should have a theme song. You know that song that resonates in your head when you need to summon up courage, roar out frustration, etc. Mine is “Let it Snow”. Timely this holiday season, but I find myself singing the first line- ‘Oh the weather outside is frightful’- even in July when I find stress overpowering me. For some reason, it calms me down.
• I’ve reached the stage in my life that I don’t give a crap. Or at least not as much crap as I used to about certain things like whether my clothes are perfect or if my house is spotless. Life is too complicated and short to worry about the tiniest things. Besides, if my friends are going to judge me by my apparel or home, then they’re not the people I want around me anyway.
• Men. Ah, what I’ve learned about men in the last 35 years could take up a whole month of blog entries. So I’ll highlight a few below in reference to what women need to know about men.
• All women need three types of men in their life. One man can be more than one type, and maybe you’ve married the rare man who can pull off all three, but most likely you’ll need at least two different guys to fulfill these needs. First, a woman needs one man (husband, son, father, etc.) to love her unconditionally. No matter what. Second, a woman has to have a honest male friend where sex never enters the picture. Yeah, you can argue When Harry Met Sally, but the friendship is possible. Last, a woman should find a guy who thinks she’s hot. I’m not suggesting an affair, or even a flirtation if you are married (and hopefully if you are married, it’s your husband saying it), but every woman over 30 needs a man who tells her she’s sexy and means it!
• Every woman over 30 needs to have at least one thing they regret, they’re ashamed of, or would like a do over. This means you’re not perfect, but you’ve grown enough to know it.
• Also, every woman over 30 should have something in their past they’re proud of, something they knew was crazy to do but they don’t regret it, and something they relive in their mind with a smile on their face. Honey, this means you’ve lived!
• As for love affairs, I think every woman over 30 should have a few types (again, one relationship can more than one type). One should break your heart. One should show you what love is NOT. One should make you wonder where that person is today. One should end in a friendship and one should carry on forever.
• Despite what it might feel like when you’re waiting in that school yard to pick up your child(ren), you are no longer in school. Yes, you could get caught up in all that crazy clique stuff from high school and feel like the nerd, band geek, cheerleader, sports star, etc. you were then. But remember, you most likely AREN’T the same person now! High school was decades ago- DECADES! Be who you are now and embrace it! And if people still view you as that high school character, then they lose out.
• Life is not a popularity contest. I’ve discovered that a few close friends that I trust and love are more important than a hundred acquaintances. In addition, I don’t need a jammed packed social schedule to feel loved and important (and thank goodness, since my calendar has no room for social fun after work and my kids’ stuff!)
• Every woman should have a guilty pleasure. Maybe it’s reality tv, dark chocolate, erotic novels or 80s love songs. Whatever it is, the guilty pleasure needs to be something that you’re slightly embarrassed about and rarely admit to acquaintances, but something you don’t want to live without (mind you, these are different from bad addictions). I’ll admit to two of mine– teen dramas (One Tree Hill Season 4 just arrived from Netflix! Wahooo!) and Star Wars (namely the X-Box lego video game), now admit to yours!
• Family is the most important. This group of people may be blood related, legally tied to you or bonded in other ways (i.e. friends), but they are essential. Without family, you’re a solo person floating around in the world with no home base.

I think that’s all I can think of this week. Here are a few more I borrowed from others:

11 Things Women Over 30 Wish Men Knew…

http://www.justkeepthechange.com/11-things-women-over-30-wish-men-knew
Although there’s debate whether Andy Rooney truly wrote this, but here’s an ode to Women Over 30:

http://www.borodinobullett.com/Inbox/beauty_of_30.htm

Now what about you? Any major life lessons you’ve learned (at no matter what age you are?)

-Meg

Each year I try to start my Christmas shopping earlier but the intention has resulted in the opposite desired effect - I find that in trying to get everything done in advance, the actual shopping task takes me longer to complete and it also takes me longer to get into the holiday spirit.  I’m slowly starting to come around, thanks in part to my favorite things that I associate with this time of year:

I am writing this blog in the few minutes I have before I have to get ready for one of my new traditions – off to see the Nutcracker!  I started going a few years ago and try to see a production of it every year.  It always makes me feel festive.

Toys for Tots. My heart breaks when I think about the families whose children won’t have a new toy to open on Christmas morning.  Last year I bought a few toys for this cause, and it’s one of the things that I most look forward to doing again this year.  I can’t wait to go toy shopping!

The Salvation Army bell ringers.  These people stand outside stores, ringing their bells in yucky weather as more rude people than not pass by their collection bowl.  I’m not saying that anyone has to donate money to this cause, but a polite smile and a kind word for these volunteers might give them a little warmth on a cold night.  This cause makes me wish I had more disposable income to spread around.

Holiday movies – I love the movies from my childhood, my absolute favorite being A Year Without A Santa Claus.  But for me, nothing beats Charles Dickens’s A Christmas Carol.  My favorite version stars George C. Scott.

Christmas lights.  I could drive around for hours and look at lights, trees, wreaths, and bows.  I so appreciate the time and effort (and expense) that people put into decorating their homes each Christmas. 

Holiday music.  I’ve had my Christmas carols playing since early November.  My favorite holiday tunes are the classics by Johnny Mathis, Bing Crosby, Dean Martin and the Vince Guaraldi Trio.  But nothing beats hearing Nat King Cole croon The Christmas Song.

Bowl Games.  It’s bittersweet for me to see the college football season come to an end, but at least it does so in such a fun and frenzied way. 

The first snow, which I think is beautiful and magical and peaceful . . . and now that we’ve had it I’m ready for Spring!  Baby, it’s cold outside!

A few extra days off.  And I can’t wait!  I’ll spend some of this free time with my family but I also look forward to having an uninterrupted block to take care of the life maintenance that I’ve put on hold and to also make some significant writing progress.  It may sound oxymoronic to want to take vacation so I can look forward to getting to work, but that’s where I’m at.

Here’s hoping you’ll find time to write while enjoying your favorite things of the season.

 -Jessica 

It has been a crazy year. And not just for me. Every time I turn around, someone I know and/or love is going through something major. I’m an HSP (highly sensitive person) so to know that so many people in my little microcosm of the world are going through so much is a little overwhelming - magnify that random sample times the millions of people around us and you can pretty much guess that fairly large numbers of people everywhere are going through some serious . . . stuff.

I’ve mentioned a few times during the course of this blog that I love to read, so when the going gets tough I turn to words. Bria and Meg and I often commiserate, and our shared gripes led us to start a little Jack club - and by Jack, I mean Jack Canfield. I immediately started reading Jack’s “Success Principles” book and felt inspired. Bria encouraged me to try “The Power of Focus” and we started doing the exercises in the chapters together. We created a new verb for what we were doing - she would call me and say, “Are we going to Jack this week?” We even set up our own little Yahoo group among the three of us where we had planned to Jack each Thursday.

Then life and writing and other obligations interrupted our Jack progress, so we’ve tabled our Jacking each week until we all have the flexbility to devote more time to it. Even though we aren’t actively Jacking at the moment, there are some principles that have stayed with me and that I practice every day.

In both books Jack advocates for an attitude of gratitude. To be grateful for things big and small. To recount, at the end of each day, at least five things from that day for which you are thankful. In Jack’s world, an attitude of gratitude is intrinsically linked with the Law of Attraction - if you are thankful with pure intention and genuine gratitude, good things will come your way. I may not have yet reached the pinnacle of where I want to be, but I can say that I notice a big difference in the way I feel when I consciously work gratitude into my thoughts rather than let the nasty comments dominate my internal dialogue. (Not that I am nasty, but a good example of this internal dialogue often rears it’s head when I’m driving, as Bria can attest. Too many jack*sses have somehow qualified for the license to operate some really heavy and potentially dangerous machinery.)

But I digress, as I am wont to do. Where was I?

Right, the attitude of gratitude. So with Thanksgiving already upon us, we thought we might take this week on the blog to talk about what we’re grateful for this holiday season.

I truly am grateful for the blessings in my life, of which there are many. And here are some, in no particular order:

Family and friends. I learned early on in my life to tell the people you care about how much you really care about them because you never know when you’re going to get another chance. I don’t take them for granted and I love them intensely with my whole heart.

So it is in this spirit that I share my thanks with Meg and Bria for embarking on this blog venture with me. When we talked about the possibility of the Purple Hearts in early spring, I had no idea how it would evolve or what it would come to mean to me. It’s been a great endeavor, and I thank you ladies for sharing it with me (and for so many other things!).

My health. And I know that item might be the most trite thing to say when it comes to gratitude, but trust me - you don’t realize what it means to be healthy until you find out you’re not. One of my favorite blogs, I Slept with Robert DeNiro . . . But About My Cancer is written by a television writer who was diagosed with cancer earlier this year. She writes a very honest, at-times painful, and poignant blog about her experiences, but her sharp sense of humor makes it a must-read.

Natural Beauty. There’s this tree outside my bedroom window and I could lay in my bed and stare at it for hours. It’s magnificent. Or the sunset out my back door. Or a wild, windy gray day (my favorite). Or mild temperatures on a bright sunny day where the brilliant natural colors and comfortable warmth and mixed inherent sounds and sweet smells all make me feel like I’m living in HD. Plug in a little Bach and I could sit in the middle of a field and feel like I was in church.

Little Things. Like a series of green lights on my drive to work in the morning. Something as mundane as my bed. Or something unexpectedly thoughtful as someone who holds the door for the next person. Or a genuine thank you. Kindness goes a long way.

My most precious possessions. These would have to be my books! I am an addict, but I can’t help but be grateful for my love for reading. I can’t imagine getting by without it.  

Uanswered Prayers. If I had gotten what I thought I once wanted, I would now most likely be heavily medicated and living in Guam. Things have a way of working themselves out for the better . . . even if you can’t see the why of it at the time.

Perspective.

Unexpected Surprises.

And I am grateful when I arrive safely at my destination at the start and end of each day. I watch some of these drivers around me, and they just re-affirm my belief that there is a higher power much greater than any of us. It’s a miracle that more near-misses don’t result in fatal crashes and I am more grateful than I can say when I know that my loved ones and I have made it safely through another day.

Be careful out there! Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving - may you have lots to be thankful for this holiday season and throughout the new year.

-Jessica